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BAD JOKES
By Reginlief 28 on 26/11/2010
Got one? Tell one. (P.S. It has to be a *bad* joke)
I'll start.
How do they celebrate Thanksgiving in Turkey?
They don't.
I'll start.
How do they celebrate Thanksgiving in Turkey?
They don't.
By Zemus3654 on 26/11/2010
WAT DID THE CAR SAY TO THE BRIDGE????
u make me cross
u make me cross
By Kyle on 26/11/2010
So, this man walks into a bar.
He's an alcoholic and his drinking habits are destroying his family.
He's an alcoholic and his drinking habits are destroying his family.
By WG_Keanu on 26/11/2010
By Flame Outlaw on 26/11/2010
Chuck Norris once defeated an entire basement of Korean teenagers in Starcraft.
-End
-End
By Reginlief 28 on 27/11/2010
Good one, Chuck Norris jokes are always awful.
Why was Josef Stalin afraid of flying in a plane?
He was afraid the engines would begin stallin' and the plane would crash.
Why was Josef Stalin afraid of flying in a plane?
He was afraid the engines would begin stallin' and the plane would crash.
By Sum-41xx on 30/11/2010
How long is a Chinese Man?
...O wait, I spelt it wrong, Hoa Long is a Chinese Man... It's a statement, not a joke
Knock knock
Who's there?
who?
I'm good at making bad jokes. 100% of the time I'm effective at making bad jokes 60% of the time.
...O wait, I spelt it wrong, Hoa Long is a Chinese Man... It's a statement, not a joke
Knock knock
Who's there?
who? I'm good at making bad jokes. 100% of the time I'm effective at making bad jokes 60% of the time.
By His_Lordship on 30/11/2010
Why did the boy fall off the swing?
Because someone threw a fridge at him.
How do you8 wake up Lady Gaga?
Poke-her-face!!!!
Because someone threw a fridge at him.
How do you8 wake up Lady Gaga?
Poke-her-face!!!!
By WG_Keanu on 30/11/2010
The largest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan Island , but it turned out
to be an optical Aleutian .
She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class,
because it was a weapon of math disruption.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum
Blownapart.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.
The police are looking into it.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway.
One hat said to the other:"You stay here; I'll go on a head."
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said; "Keep off the grass."
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium
at large.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
seasoned veteran.
A backward poet writes inverse.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts.
In feudalism it's your count that votes.
When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
If you jumped off the bridge in Paris , you'd be in Seine .
A vulture boards an airplane carrying two dead raccoons.
The stewardess looks at him and says,
"I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger."
Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says "Dam!"
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the
craft.
Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak
and heat it too.
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?
His goal: transcend dental medication.
He acquired his size from too much pi.
I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan Island , but it turned out
to be an optical Aleutian .
She was only a whiskey maker, but he loved her still.
A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class,
because it was a weapon of math disruption.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum
Blownapart.
Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.
The police are looking into it.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway.
One hat said to the other:"You stay here; I'll go on a head."
I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger.
Then it hit me.
A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said; "Keep off the grass."
The midget fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium
at large.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a
seasoned veteran.
A backward poet writes inverse.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts.
In feudalism it's your count that votes.
When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
If you jumped off the bridge in Paris , you'd be in Seine .
A vulture boards an airplane carrying two dead raccoons.
The stewardess looks at him and says,
"I'm sorry, sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger."
Two fish swim into a concrete wall.
One turns to the other and says "Dam!"
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the
craft.
Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak
and heat it too.
Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive."
Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?
His goal: transcend dental medication.
By sir dazzy on 30/11/2010
Keanu For Counsil!!!!!!!!
By WizardOfGod on 30/11/2010
| QUOTE: sir dazzy @ November 30, 2010 04:36 pm) |
| Keanu For Counsil!!!!!!!! |
LOLOLOOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOOLOLOLO
By Xzy 666 on 01/12/2010
What did the chick say to it's mom when she laid an orange?
Look what marmalade.
Look what marmalade.
By Kyle on 01/12/2010
What did the priest say to the little boy?
"Don't forget to say your prayers every night."
"Don't forget to say your prayers every night."
By Reginlief 28 on 01/12/2010
Brilliant jokes! lol 
By Kyle on 01/12/2010
So a dyslexic guy walks into a bra
By Zemus3654 on 02/12/2010
i thought this was relevant
[20:58] <fx> A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "How much for a drink?" The bartender says, "For you? No charge."
[20:58] <fx> A neutron walks into a bar and asks, "How much for a drink?" The bartender says, "For you? No charge."
By Garrett on 06/12/2010
LOLOLOLOL How many mooses does it take to get a mus
none theres no U.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
this is your response.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOL
none theres no U.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
this is your response.
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOL
By Reginlief 28 on 06/12/2010
haha
By Oldschool on 07/12/2010
question mark on his face?
By Kevin on 09/12/2010
| QUOTE: Garrett @ December 05, 2010 10:01 pm) |
|
LOLOLOLOL How many mooses does it take to get a mus none theres no U. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL this is your response. LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOL |
IT'S ROB!
By Nufciv on 27/04/2011
Omg lol... Lame but u read a few and start out laughing.............
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By Wayshow on 27/04/2011
Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?
He had no guts
Taken from biology textbook... Lolol
When Is a car not a car?
When it turns into a driveway
He had no guts
Taken from biology textbook... Lolol
When Is a car not a car?
When it turns into a driveway
By Dallar on 27/04/2011
All the children ran out of the burning school
Except for Matt the spastic
- He skipped school that day.
Except for Matt the spastic
- He skipped school that day.
By Reticked on 28/04/2011
I'll make up one on the spot based off of an irl conversation
Why don't rocks make good boyfriends?
They always take everything for granite
Why don't rocks make good boyfriends?
They always take everything for granite
By levylov on 28/04/2011
What is red and smells like blue paint?
Red paint!
Red paint!
By Wayshow on 29/04/2011
What is brown and sticky?
A stick
A stick
By Dallar on 29/04/2011
Why can't women drive?
There's no road between the bed and the kitchen!
There's no road between the bed and the kitchen!
By Wayshow on 29/04/2011
^isnt that a bit sexist?
anyway
why did the cook get arrested?
he got caught for beating up an egg
anyway
why did the cook get arrested?
he got caught for beating up an egg
By tumpelo on 30/04/2011
What's red and black with ten sharp edges?
By Vulcan Sin on 30/04/2011
an obby shield ? ^^^
By Armybuilder1 on 30/04/2011
What do you call a french man wearing flip flops
PHILLIPPE PHILLIPPE
PHILLIPPE PHILLIPPE
By tumpelo on 30/04/2011
| QUOTE: Vulcan Sin @ April 30, 2011 10:19 am) |
| an obby shield ? ^^^ |
Haa it was going to be a bad joke because there was no punch line!
Now you've given an answer I suppose it just becomes a statement of fact!
An obby shield....yeah I guess so!
By demomc on 01/05/2011
Whats long and hard and full of seamen...
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