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Need Advice...

By Kaneko86 on 10/01/2011
As some of you guys may know or have noticed, I have been through some pretty dark events lately - some of which having to do with how scared I am of life. I am mostly scared of finding a job. For the past 3 years I had had a lot of trouble finding permanent work. There were the temporary jobs that lasted for as long as 6 months and there was a lot of volunteer experience. However, finding permanent work has been a huge problem for me. My resume has been turned down so many times, and even though I had made it to the interview portion of the jobs, I still haven't gotten the job because they wanted someone with more experience. The entry-level jobs such as Zeller's and grocery stores also won't hire me either for some reason, which is incredibly sad. Because of all this rejection, I have become discouraged and my self-esteem and confidence have been lowered incredibly...as if they were low enough. My mom isn't helping things either... She always says things that hurt me and they lower my confidence even more. I have Autism as well, which also affects how I speak with people and the interviews have been a huge problem for me to overcome (except for the temporary jobs).

What must I do to boost my confidence? I am scared of looking for a job, and I want to move out of my parents' house as soon as possible.

I look forward to your feedback...

By ZurvivorMan on 10/01/2011
What i do to get my confidence back up is do things that i like and take a break from all the other things.
You shouldn't feel bad because your not getting the job you want, just look past it(?). Just search on all the jobs you can find and take what you can get. And tell your parents how you really feel, it always works, it worked for me when i told them i wanted to quitt school. They'll understand, trust me smile.gif

Sorry for my bad explaining, I'm Norwegian... smile.gif

By WizardOfGod on 10/01/2011
Ok i believe with autism you can get money off the state (if you live usa) but ya. Also if you live usa jobs like stop and shop hire EVERYONE my friend has a felony and he got a job there. A good start is asking a family friend who is self employed if they are hiring usually they will hire you because your a family friend. Also great place to start is seasonal jobs such as
winter-shovel/plow for a company or alone
spring/fall- power-wash and clean gutters (makes bank)
summer- to many landscaping jobs you can do

also if your in highschool don't worry bout all this because you still have plenty of time to move up in life and if you are i wouldn't be getting low self esteem because your still young. Also if your not at college but of age go to community for a year or two then transfer to a uni so you can get the qualifications behind you. Truly if your out of college you should start applying (serious note here) mcdonalds and what not or any place where you can get a job so you could get some income to get the rents off your back. Then you find another one while you are working.

My current job setup is epic because i don't work daily (i can't do that daily shit)
Summer- work for a catering company cooking for rockstars and what not backstage at concerts (obviously this is a high level kinda thing but you can work at concert places and its seasonal)
Fall/Winter- Start of fall i clean gutters with a company make at least 100$ a day and then in the end of fall and winter i ref hockey i been doing this for 5 years now and the more years you put in the more you make because your official's level goes up i went from 50 bucks a month to at least a grand
Spring-Powerwashing and cleaning gutters like i said 100$ plus a day its bank
Also some random odd jobs that come my way if i really need to stack bills i just sell though.

On a side note if none of this can apply to you such as reffing a sport or w/e then truthfully you got to WANT to make money once your whole drive is around i hate being broke i WANT to make money your set for life. Once you have that drive you will work anywhere and do any kinda job you can that pays.

** but you should probably talk to your mom in a one on one convo that is done calmly and not arguably stating your issues and have these things worked through so she see's where you come from and will help you out.

By rachellove9 on 10/01/2011
Autism is not any different from any other type of disorder or sickness or physical problem. You just need to be able to figure out what you 'can' do. Maybe reading emotions from people isn't your strong point. But giving directions clearly and very understandable is. Then you don't belong in a place where you have to one on one with customers to their face but maybe answer the phone from a desk.

Anyone interviewing you will pick up on if you feel the autism is a problem. I'd say practice telling them in front of a mirror about it. Making sure you don't use words like don't, can't, won't or any other negative wording. You have to focus on selling all your positives instead.

Example:

Not this: I have Autism and I don't work well with people.

Instead this: Even though I have Autism, I am very willing to work with people.

Both sorta say the same thing. But the second one sounds like you are a nice person and I should hire you.

This has strategies like what I am talking about on it.

Good Luck and feel free to come talk to me and ask for help. I'm always open to trying to help people.

Rachy




By Kaneko86 on 10/01/2011
QUOTE: ZurvivorMan @ January 10, 2011 04:35 am)
What i do to get my confidence back up is do things that i like and take a break from all the other things.
You shouldn't feel bad because your not getting the job you want, just look past it(?). Just search on all the jobs you can find and take what you can get. And tell your parents how you really feel, it always works, it worked for me when i told them i wanted to quitt school. They'll understand, trust me smile.gif

Sorry for my bad explaining, I'm Norwegian... smile.gif

No, no problem. In fact, I understand what you are getting at. My dad understands a great deal. However, my mom is a different story. I get really discouraged however when the job company doesn't call me back, but I guess I gotta learn to move past that.

By Kaneko86 on 10/01/2011
QUOTE: rachellove9 @ January 10, 2011 07:29 am)
Autism is not any different from any other type of disorder or sickness or physical problem. You just need to be able to figure out what you 'can' do. Maybe reading emotions from people isn't your strong point. But giving directions clearly and very understandable is. Then you don't belong in a place where you have to one on one with customers to their face but maybe answer the phone from a desk.

Anyone interviewing you will pick up on if you feel the autism is a problem. I'd say practice telling them in front of a mirror about it. Making sure you don't use words like don't, can't, won't or any other negative wording. You have to focus on selling all your positives instead.

Example:

Not this: I have Autism and I don't work well with people.

Instead this: Even though I have Autism, I am very willing to work with people.

Both sorta say the same thing. But the second one sounds like you are a nice person and I should hire you.

This has strategies like what I am talking about on it.

Good Luck and feel free to come talk to me and ask for help. I'm always open to trying to help people.

Rachy

Thank you for the advice, Rachel. I will definitely at this site from time to time, and I'll talk to you whenever possible.

By Sum-41xx on 12/01/2011
Just keep trying. I probably went through 10 interviews before i landed my first one. The big key is to keep positive as people mentioned above. If you think of yourself as a manager hiring some one, wouldn't you be more inclined to hire the one that conveys a positive attitude?
Another factor you have to remember is that because your job career has really just started (from what I understand), and you're probably applying mainly at retail businesses (for the most part), you have to sell yourself. You have to narrow down what makes you better than the other people that the managers interviewing. As an example, I know that a common question asked goes something like "what is one of your negative qualities that we should know about" or something along those lines. Now you can tell them that sometimes you lose interest in your work, but as rachell mentioned, you gotta tell them in a positive way. So you can say "well, sometimes I get bored at work when there's no work to be done, so (and here's the key part) I often will bug my manager or co-worker for more work to do" or something like that. It's a negative quality that you get bored, but its positive that you take the initiative to go bug your manager and say "hey, everything seems to be done, is there anymore things that you need me to do". It basically tells the manager/person hiring you that you're efficient and your always looking to do something more.

I wish you good luck in finding a job! I'm sure you'll get one soon. Just keep trying and be persistent. Hand out your resume at as many places at possibles.

By Kaneko86 on 12/01/2011
QUOTE: Sum-41xx @ January 11, 2011 10:14 pm)
Just keep trying. I probably went through 10 interviews before i landed my first one. The big key is to keep positive as people mentioned above. If you think of yourself as a manager hiring some one, wouldn't you be more inclined to hire the one that conveys a positive attitude?
Another factor you have to remember is that because your job career has really just started (from what I understand), and you're probably applying mainly at retail businesses (for the most part), you have to sell yourself. You have to narrow down what makes you better than the other people that the managers interviewing. As an example, I know that a common question asked goes something like "what is one of your negative qualities that we should know about" or something along those lines. Now you can tell them that sometimes you lose interest in your work, but as rachell mentioned, you gotta tell them in a positive way. So you can say "well, sometimes I get bored at work when there's no work to be done, so (and here's the key part) I often will bug my manager or co-worker for more work to do" or something like that. It's a negative quality that you get bored, but its positive that you take the initiative to go bug your manager and say "hey, everything seems to be done, is there anymore things that you need me to do". It basically tells the manager/person hiring you that you're efficient and your always looking to do something more.

I wish you good luck in finding a job! I'm sure you'll get one soon. Just keep trying and be persistent. Hand out your resume at as many places at possibles.

Thank you smile.gif Yea, that's what my boyfriend told me today. I have been applying to so many offices (since I have 2 and a half years of office experience and growing) and I've had so many interviews. What I do have a problem with however is that people say that they need more experience so they won't have to train them, which is pretty stupid to me since I have the skills to work in an office and, like I mentioned, 2 and a half years experience. So yea, I'll apply to a bunch of places and keep looking up posts for that. Thanks for the positive advice smile.gif



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