Samurai's Tales of Epic Win.

Yesterday was one of the single most Epic days in the history of Epic days. Ever.


PART ONE: The TV Guy.

It all started out a few days ago, yes that's right, a day that started a few days before it ever began. LOL. Anyway, a few days ago my dad had sent an email to DirecTV, our satellite TV provider, complaining about a crappy signal and screwed up equipment... for the 3rd or 4th time this month. This time though, he had somehow managed to find the email of one of the chiefs of staff over at DTV, an address known only to a few. The executives last words of the email were in fact, "How did you get this email anyway?"

The epic part of this event is this: The guy flew out here himself all the way from DENVER, along with a highly specialized team of experts from DTV headquarters, just to fix our problems. Ain't we special? They brought with them a few things. A REALLY BIG TRUCK, like THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIS big, and some equipment for us. The equipment was brand new, and I mean SO NEW that it hasn't been released to the public yet, including an HD reciever and a satellite. They spent 2-3 hours setting it all up and made SURE that it all worked perfectly and flawlessly and would stay that way for many years to come. So yea, I had a top executive take time out of his schedule to fly across the country to my house and give me better TV stoof than all of you.

EPIC WIN.



PART TWO: The School Schedule.

Some of you may have seen my thread containing my school schedule already, but it is so epic that it must be included in the Tales of Epic Win thread. It's that epic.

A week or so ago I started my plans to transfer school campuses from McKeesport to New Kensington, a bigger, better, and more local campus so that I could continue my education at maximum efficiency. Just yesterday I completed the arrangements and got my schedule set up, which is by far the greatest school schedule ever compiled by human hands. And computers. And advisors who told me what to do. >_> Whatever. Here it is:



You see it correctly, two days of school. TWO. Not three, not four, but TWO. That's almost as epic as one! Not only that, but the content of the classes is the stuff of dreams. Three IST Computer classes, including Programming, Networking, and Internet related activites(this is even an online class!), as well as Biology: The study of Ecology and Evolution(two epic subjects rolled into one!), and Ancient Mythology, the greatest research topic of them all. All of this in a campus designed to accommodate local students who want to venture further into the world of computers and studying and stuff, which is exactly what I wanna do!

EPIC WIN.



PART THREE: The Pizza.

After getting all the TV and School work done... I had to go to actual work. This part of the day actually started a few weeks ago as well, yea my entire day pretty much started in the past, 'cuz I command all of space and time ya know. Well basically the week of my birthday(June 18th) was shared by 3 other employees, who had birthdays on the 19th, 22nd, and 23rd. We had planned to have a pizza party sometime that week, but not a single day occurred where the 4 of us were together! Fail. Well guess what happened yesterday?!?! The four of us and our nicest manager all had a day scheduled together, and someone just happened to bring it up. (WASN'T ME COUGHCOUGH) And my manager, being the nice lady she is, said, "Hey, you're all here now! I'm gonna go order pizza!" And order pizza she did.

Behold, the Big Daddy Pizza from Fox's Pizza Den.


'Nuff said.

EPIC WIN.



PART FOUR: The Biggest Grocery Order and the Smallest Grocery Order.

Still at work, I was the midnight cashier! Fail. After 11pm all the other cashiers and baggers leave so I'm the only one there. Fail again. The entire time from 11-12 I only had two orders, they came at just about the same time... but it was funny.

The first order was the single largest grocery order I have EVER put across a register... And I did it all by myself. The entire order totaled at about $365, completely filled up the register space I was using so I had to start loading crap on the one next to me, and left the customer with 3 LOADED carts to leave with. It took an entire 25 minutes to do this single order alone with no help, it ate up almost all the time I had to stay there. But the most epic part of this tale?


...


...


The guy behind her had one thing to buy.

EPIC WIN.

Nice!!

P.s
I didn't read anything of it

P.s 2
Now I did!

My new comment will be...Nice!!

Damn awesome story, read the whole thing.

Write novels pls!

lol sounds like ur life is going well

Shit that is epic.

yeah that New Ken Campus is pretty nice. I dont go to New Ken after dark like ever. Gangster town tbh.

Sounds like your having some happy times. Hope it continues for you.

Epic life eh

All I can say is you are EPIC.

...Fag.

You lucky !%&

FFS, If I were that guy with one thing, I'd have just left.

EPIC is the only word that can come close to being able to describe this.

I would have been pist off like hell if i was the 2nd person lol.

Wow, Sam, I always knew you were epic..but DAMN...


Moral of the story: DirecTV pwns.

Nice luck...
And u think i can get that email?

You're lucky, that's all

I loled irl at the supermarket thing. That guy must of been so annoyed.

I'd laugh if your school blew up next week, your manager got abducted by aliens and the supermarket closed and you, YES YOU, got a sex change.

Now THAT would be epic.

ILL BUY 10 COPPIES OMG LOL AT THE GROCERY SHOPPER XD

I'm hungry